Skating Uphill

By Judith Lawrenson

January Issue 2020

Is there such a word as “unmotivated?” I’m just wondering!

Last year, 2019, was very up and down for me. I do not mean just weight either. A week or so ago I was so unmotivated to look to the future that I took my 2019 resolution lists, yes, lists, and made the 1 into a 2 by putting a little curl on the top and made the 9 into a 0 by filling in the empty space up the side. Can you picture it? It now looks like I have made new resolutions on the 2020 totally unmodified lists. BTW I still have them shamelessly up on my fridge.

Well, times change, and something happened that actually got me motivated-Christmas! I love it and as soon as I went down to the basement to unpack my boxes, the world changed. I put up all of my stuff and loved it then went to California to see my daughter for a week, then came home and slowly over the period of a week, I put things away and had quite a good time doing it. I looked at everything, re-loved it, and saw it into its box. Strangely enough, that got me on the move. I checked out my old resolutions and still liked them so that was good. I figured I could just try it all again. I had stuff on the lists that were good resolutions: write letters, eat less white sugar, call my friends, etc. those are good things, right? So, I just kept them, and I am ultra-motivated to do them. You know what they say about the second time around, right?

Okay, that is one motivation done and I am really happy with that. Happiness means you have picked something good to be motivated about, you know. In fact, I believe that thinking about doing something that will make you happy is the best of all motivators. In truth, why would you not? So, let’s try to recall a happy time, or think about a new thing that we have seen or read about that perhaps is going to move the “happy bar.” I love to cook and take several cooking magazines and I am going to try to try something our of each one at least once a week. I do not think that sounds hard since I am always trying to think of something new to have. I always check for exotic ingredients first lest I get stuck in the middle or the recipe contains something expensive that the recipe needs ½ teaspoon of and I will never use it again. That criteria dealt with, sets give some new food a try. Motivation? Sure, eating pleasure and perhaps even compliments. I love compliments and consider them to be right up there with my top motivators.

This next one is one of those “If you can afford it” ideas. How about a little trip? It is pretty cold and ugly here in January so I was thinking a small cruise? You can actually go on week-end cruises for a smaller price than you would think. If you do not like to cruise, how about just a getaway? Sometimes one night in a hotel with a pool and spa can do wonders for your outlook. Other outlook improvers that can push that motivation button are very simple. Shop a little. I do not mean for clothing, I mean for a feel good thing. Giving of yourself can bring not just a good feeling, but actual JOY! Help someone, pet a dog, or better yet adopt one, do anything that makes you feel that you have given yourself a forward push and that it felt so good you want to do it again.

My greatest motivator is a very selfish one. I am in to my very own personal health and wellbeing.  I feel sometimes that I am getting pretty old and those numbers are looking me stone cold in the eye. On the other hand, I don’t feel that I am done yet if you get what I mean. I can only go on to do more of the things that I want to do if I am fit and well enough to do them. I make myself go to the Dr. and get that flu shot and mammogram and talk about preventative medicine. I exercise and watch my weight. Perhaps that is my biggest battle, but not being able to breathe in my jeans for a whole day or having to lie on my back to zip up a pair of pants can motivate the hell out of both you and me!

Motivation is a funny, and very personal emotion. Sometimes it lasts and sometimes not, but if it is something that becomes a part of your life and value system, your original effort will be well worth it-I promise!

Skating Uphill
By Judith Lawrenson
December Issue 2019

You know that the whole quote is “Be the change you want to see in the world,” which actually makes it MUCH harder!

The Uphill Skater

Honestly, Elizabeth Millen our darling editor/publisher comes up with the best themes for PINK. What a challenge to actually bring home something as broad yet right to the point as one person making a change in the world and, whoa, having that person perhaps be YOU!!!

I am just kidding-I can think of many ways we can make meaningful changes in our surroundings and if we look at the small view of say writing a check to an organization even that has its place in betterment. As you sit and read this article, look at yourself-actually see yourself. Are you thinking that there is not much just little you can do to make a dent in the big wide world? Think again.

Do you have an extra pocket book or two floating around your closet? Go down to the Dollar Store or Wal-Mart and buy some feminine hygiene items, a wash cloth, a pair of socks, some lipstick, a pair of underpants and a t-shirt, and stuff like that. Add a $5 certificate for a fast food restaurant and give it to a homeless woman. If you can’t find one, go to your local shelter or better yet, go to a local church that has meals for the homeless. Believe me, you will be shocked at how easy it is to find a homeless woman and statistically, she will be over 50. Do you believe that. It makes you want to cry, doesn’t it?
PS-Go in person!

Next, I am asking you to “stand your ground.” You have opinions and emotions and strong feelings about many things. Examine those feelings and think carefully what threatens your convictions to those thoughts and ideas. Fight them. Think your own thoughts and act on them. Don’t let others deter you from your ideals. Is something happening in your job or life to you or someone else you care about? Do you see a big injustice or better yet, a little one? Step up. Little hurts and unfair acts are only little to the person who is not involved in it. Remember that.

See a need and fill it. Man, this is an easy one. I have a dear friend who was a victim of sexual assault when she was young. She is African American. She was moved by an article she read in her newspaper about a rape victim who was a visitor to her town and knew no one. My friend went to the hospital to see her and was denied admittance because she had no training to handle this type of situation. Give up? Not on your life. She went to the Rape Crisis Center and took the three month training course and began to advocate in her local hospital and began to visit victims. This is the heart part of this story: In almost every instance the victim was Black. In every instance she and the victim were the only African Americans in the room. Nurses, doctors, even aids and pastors were white as snow. Just imagine how a victim of abuse would feel seeing not only a sister, but finding out that her visitor was a real sister not just in color, but so much more importantly, in life experiences. See a need and fill it.

My favorite #Be the Change is the easiest and potentially the most fun. Tutor or mentor a child. Oh, poor you. You don’t need a child who may need you-Are you kidding me??? Go to your local Boys and Girls Club. Go to your local elementary School. Ask at the library. Ask a Sunday School teacher. Come on, no excuses on this one. Children who need academic help, a warm coat, a backpack of food to take home over the weekend, a friend and on and on. I go into my grandson’s Pre-K classroom once a week and it was easy to spot the little girl who needed help. Now when I go to read I spend 15 minutes with her afterward. It has been so good for me-never mind good for her, ladies. When you help someone on a face to face basis, it is just as good for you as it is for the child you are
helping.

Finally, do a thing that you know needs to be done. I can’t tell you what it is. Maybe something in a neighbor’s yard. Maybe a bag of food on a doorstep. Maybe a coat for a child you see in the classroom where you volunteer. Maybe something as simple as a phone call to a shut-in. If you think that things like this don’t change the world, you are dead wrong. These, in fact, are the only things that are going to change the world. In the process and as an unforeseen side effect, you will be changed too. Trust me on this!